AFL Banner Man predicts Pies will go "down down"

Comedian Danny McGinlay uses current affairs to take a jab at Collingwood.

CONTRIBUTOR | May 15, 2026 - 2:24pm

Queensland wildlife, economic crises and the trials of a banner writer have been highlighted in this week's banners, as imagined by Danny McGinlay (aka The Banner Man).

The comedian is once again showing off his poetical chops with four lyrical banners imagined for tonight's lineup.

The Sydney Swans' banner focuses on current events, taking the opportunity to throw a jab at both Collingwood and Coles. The supermarket giant has recently come under fire in the Federal Court for offering misleading discounts. Sydney's banner assures fans that, unlike Cole's prices, the Magpies will stay "down, down", a reference that is sure to get most of Australia (particularly Woolworths fans) giggling.

Not to be outdone, the Collingwood banner also features a reference to financial current affairs, with a shot that might hit closer to home for Swans fans. The banner reminds the "Eastern Sydney upper class" that, not only could they lose the game, they could lose their capital gains discounts, following budget updates this week. The clever jab is sure to get Sydney fans whipped up ahead of their home game tonight.

Turning the attention to the second Friday evening match, the Gold Coast Suns' banner is cheap and cheerful, welcoming fans to their stadium and encouraging them to "pack it to the brim." However it quickly takes a darker turn as it suggests visiting Port fans ignore warning signs about crocodiles and take a swim anyway.

Rather than clap back, Port's imaginary banner highlights the Indigenous round. Port Adelaide, alongside five other clubs, have elected to change their name to the traditional name of their land "Yartapuulti" for the duration of the fortnight. While emphasising how great the Sir Doug Nicholls round is, the banner playfully points out the struggles of banner writers of trying to find a word to rhyme with Yartapuulti.