It's not disturbing, it's just bloody sad.
That's the takeaway as Elijah Hollands becomes the biggest story in the AFL.
The vision of Hollands looking disoriented and totally out of sorts on footy's biggest stage of all, the MCG in prime time, would have impacted anyone with an ounce of compassion.
When it went viral on social media, I watched it unfold as a Dad, contemplating how shattered I would be if it was my son in such vulnerable state playing in the most competitive professional sport in the land.
I met Hollands in Wodonga in November, 2020, ahead of the national draft for a story for Seven News. Fresh-faced, bubbly and outgoing with turbo-charged optimism ... a terrific young fellow.
He had star factor on the field and off it. Many interviews with young draftees are forgettable, this one stuck with me.
His father Ben was there for the shoot, along with young Ollie, who had a kick-to-kick for the cameraman. Just a great family.
I've kept in touch with Ben sporadically since. I felt gutted for him on Thursday night. He's such a positive person and supportive parent.
I also felt for young Ollie, the extra in the TV package that day who is now also a Blue. He must have known his brother was battling. It was surely playing on his mind in the midst of the almost impossible task of shutting down Nick Daicos.
The Blues met after the game again this morning, and it has become clear Hollands was the victim of a mental health episode. The Blues are sure the erratic unusual behaviour was not drug related.
The club will throw its support behind Hollands, who had time away from the game last year. He spoke to The Age last October about his reliance on alcohol to cope with anxiety.
Clearly, it all came to a head on Thursday night.
You can understand Carlton defending its processes, but from the outside it is astounding Hollands played 60 per cent of game time.
There is vision of him unusually fluffing a set shot in the warm-up. Hindsight is a luxury the Blues didn't have, but the vision just doesn't look right.
Somehow, the Blues kept Hollands out there for most of the game. He had one disposal, a dribbler along the boundary added after a Champion Data audit - an incredibly tough watch for family and friends from the stands.
It is highly likely Hollands will now take a break from the game, in the short-term at least, to deal with his demons.
Let's all get behind Elijah and the rest of the Hollands family, whose whole AFL journey started with so much joy and optimism.
It's tough at times being a Dad. Those scenes on Thursday night, spreading like wildfire and socials, really rammed that home.
